You know you’re not supposed to be drinking or doing drugs but for one reason or another, you find yourself drunk or high again. The problem is, you need to put up an appearance that you’re not.
While acting that you’re sober might not be the best idea to get you cleaned up, you need a temporary solution right now to get you over this tough squeeze.
So what can you do to look like you’re clear headed and you got your stuff together? Here are some practical tips that could help you pull this off.
1. Keep sitting down
When you’re intoxicated, you’re likely to have your balance and coordination compromised. This is the reason why most people who are drunk or high can’t walk straight. To avoid having people see you stumbling over, find a place where you can sit down and park yourself. However try to avoid a seat that’s too comfortable as you might snooze off instead.
2. Hold on to something
If it is not possible to sit down, try to find a furniture, a railing or anything stable to hold on to. Resting your hand to hold your balance will help you prevent yourself from swaying of falling over. Don’t try to grip too hard so it will not be too obvious that you’re holding for your life!
3. Hide your eyes or use eye drops
Your eyes are a dead giveaway when you’re drunk or high as they tend to be red or droopy. The appearance of your pupils may also change so it will be a good idea to hide your eyes. Do this by wearing sunglasses during daytime. At night, you can wear non-prescription eyeglasses to serve as a barrier for your eyes. Even clear, non-tinted eye glasses are still better than having no eye wear at all. If having eye wear is not possible, use eye drops to clear your eyes and remove redness.
4. Keep phrases short and speak slowly
When you talk too fast and talk too much, you’re more likely to slur your words and say things that are nonsensical. Avoid outing yourself by holding your tongue. Only talk when you’re required to do so, but keep yourself engaged in the conversation by nodding your head and leaning forward a little.
When you have to talk, keep it short and simple. Don’t engage in complicated topics as you may not be able to think clearly when asked an opinion. Speak carefully and enunciate your words to avoid slurring.
5. Freshen yourself
Spray some cold water on your face to look more alert. Comb your hair neatly and if you wear makeup, retouch your lipstick to look fresh and put together. When your hair is unkempt and your makeup is smeared, this is an easy telltale of being smashed.
6. Wear clean clothes and dress sharply
Before people even have a good look at your face, the first thing they see from afar is your outfit. If you are walking around wearing rumpled and dirty clothes, people are more likely to suspect that you’re woozy even if you’re not.
But when you’re sharply dressed, you are putting out an aura of being in control and self-confidence. If you find yourself drunk, go to the washroom and straighten up your clothes. Tuck in your shirt or remove any stain if any.
7. Look busy when in a public place
If you are in a car, in a public place or with a group of people, and you don’t want anyone to suspect that you’re drunk, looking busy can help you keep off people.
Focus on your phone or pretend to read an eBook. You can also fake a phone call and pretend you are speaking to someone. When you look preoccupied, people would think twice before approaching you to make conversation.
8. Disguise your scent
Scent is an instant giveaway of being drunk so popping in some breath mints is an instant fix. Spray your clothes and yourself with a deodorant or a strong cologne to mask the smell of alcohol or weed. Don’t forget spraying your hair too because hair can easily absorb smell.
If you don’t have access to mints or cologne, you can also mask your smell by eating strong smelling food like flavored chips, garlicky dishes or food that has a lot of spice like curry. People will focus more on this smell and may be able to help you cover up your alcohol breath.
How acting sober will help you become one
The mere fact that you’re reading this article is a good sign that you are aware of the bad effects of being drunk or being high. You want to put up a facade of sobriety because you know that the people around you may react negatively if they find out that you’ve over indulged.
While these tips may help you get away with your current predicament, these will not help you keep up the pretense of being clean in the long-term. If you keep drinking or using, you will potentially reach a point where you’ll be too drunk or too high to even manage faking anything.
It is not impossible to become truly sober. There are now specialized modes of treatment that can help you get over your addiction struggles. Contact Lighthouse Treatment Center to learn more. Help is available today.